Nashville, TN

Today I called Metro Water to set up service at my new diggs starting Monday. My conversation with “w’ell-call-her-Rhonda” was a little dry, yet entertaining. Here’s how it went (in my head - you know in that alternate universe Ally McBeal style)

MW: Thanks for calling Metro Water, my name is “Rhonda” customer service #41, how may I help you. (no, no question mark - because she didn’t say it like a question. It was all rather monotoned and ran together, you see.)

Me: Hi, I need to establish new service (I only knew to say it like that because the programmed menu kept saying, “if you’d like to establish new service, press 2″; otherwise, I would have stammered until something less eloquent came out like, uh…I need water)

Rhonda: ok what’s the address

Me: (I gave it to her, but I’m not gonna write it here. Duh, do you think I’m crazy?)

Rhonda: and what name should go on the account?

Me: Ramsey

Rhonda: I need first and last name

Me: ok, try Emily Ramsey

Rhonda: do you have a middle initial?

Me: Do YOU have a middle initial?

**** silence ****

Me: K.

Rhonda: and I’m gonna need your social

Me: I’ll give you mine if you give me yours…

***silence***

Me: (…and then I give it to her…cuz I need water)

Rhonda: click

So… come Monday, I will either have water, or a stolen identity. But it’s ok, because Rhonda doesn’t know she’s closing on a house today and has a new mortgage come November.

Click.

My friends and I took in the latest and greatest of the Jason Bourne trilogy on Friday. We bought tickets to the 9:00 at the Carmike Cinema in Cool Springs. After securing our spots at the theater, we had dinner at the muoy delish Ghengis Grill nearby. If you haven’t been there yet, stop what you are doing right now and fix that. It is the Mongolian barbecue concept, and they have everything you could possibly want to throw on a grill with rice. Chicken, steak, shrimp, lobster, vegetables, fruit, seasonings, sauces, you name it. You won’t be disappointed.

After dinner, we had about an hour or so to kill before movie. We decided to walk around outdoors in attempt to settle the copious amounts of food we had just ingested. And not too long after we started walking, the inevitable happened. We needed to find a restroom.

Someone had the big idea that Chuck E. Cheese would suffice. I wasn’t too sure. I thought we had to buy admission just to get past the faux velvet ropes. So we sent in the lackey (the only boy in our trio) to get the sitch. As we peered through the windows like stalkers without restraining orders, we saw him gain access to the facility with little-to-no quandary. So we did what any good friends would do. We followed suit.

Sure enough, we too were admitted without so much as a puzzled expression. The door-master did, however, roll her eyes at us in exasperation when we tried without success to convince her that our “special adult friend” needed retrieving from the skee-ball stand, and that we were very sorry for letting him out of his car seat unattended.

So here we are, three adults wandering the child-packed Cool Springs Chuck E. Cheese on a Friday night, with no other business there but to…well, do our business. And had the entire restaraunt not smelled like stinky feet (I think that was the pizza), we might have stayed for a round of Caveman Crashers.

All I’m sayin’ is…parents beware. Not of us, of course - we’re harmless. But not all unsupervised adults aimlessly pacing a children’s facility are quite as safe as we are.

If you know what I mean.

My inside sources have told me that the Caffino on Old Hickory Blvd at Nippers Corner has packed up and moved out. In it’s place, a glorious industry pioneer will establish presence, bringing light, love, and low-fat, low-carb, high-protein, deliciously smooth and cold pre and post workout meals-through-a-straw to all who patron its walls. What is this modern marvel, you ask?

Why Smoothie King, of course. Sandwiched in between Schlotsky’s and State Farm.

Life is about to get even better.

Watch this video about Safe Haven Family Shelter . “Watch while I’m waiting for what?” you may ask. Well, you have to get to the end of the video to find that out.

I won’t say anything more about them, because this video says it all perfectly. Just give them 7:43 minutes of your time and then, who knows…you take it from there.

I’ll see all y’all in a week. I’m off to Panama! Keep coming back each day though while Michael holds down the fort.

Alright, during yesterday’s comments regarding “where are all the single people?” (answer: not in Nashville), I noticed a little snarkiness over one of our local Dining Experience du jours.

I have to ask: what exactly is everyone’s beef with Cabana?

No, I’m not a regular who sits at the 5:00 bar, sweeping in and ordering up, “Tony! My regular!”

Yes, I’ve eaten there once or twice. It was good. A little more than I like to drop on one meal, but tasty. A fine, casual, breezy dining encounter.

Dare I ask again, what’s your beef with Cabana? Seriously, if there is a reason I need to dislike this place, just let me know what it is. I can be persuaded…even bribed. But as it stands, I’d recommend it to people I like.

Titans tickets officially went on sale late last week. People were camping out to get their maximum 4 tickets to 2 games. Guess who got in on the action?

Who else out there got tix?

On another LP Field note, I was down there on Saturday afternoon to take some photos on the Riverfront. I parked at the field way out where people normally tailgate. Because I don’t normally hang out in the parking lot of LP Field on Saturdays, my question is this: do people normally hang out in the parking lot at LP Field on the Saturdays…even when there is no event going on there? I mean, there was a tent, under which a small group was just hanging out. They were sitting in lawn chairs under this tent, drinking beer, and shooting the proverbial bull. There were also several groups of kids, again, hanging out, smoking, skateboarding, talking…not really doing much of anything. And Saturday was HOT! It was hot as fire out there, and most of these people there were just standing out in the sun….not even sitting under the pedestrian bridge in the somewhat-shade. I’ll ask again, is this NORMAL? Is this what people DO on the weekends here? There’s got to be a catch. I just haven’t caught it yet.

Any suggestions as to what this may have been will be greatly appreciated as this scene deeply concerned freaked me out.

I need to know so I’m gonna do a quick poll:

Best barbecue in Nashville?

I have a few in mind, and have a new partial-fav. But as always, I want to hear from you.

Call me co-dependent.

If you’re a smoker and you have something to say about the new tax hike, say it here. But only after I say what I have to say about it. It is my site after all.

I’m not a smoker, and I despise being around others when they’re smoking. I feel it is an infringement on my right to breathe. So naturally, anything that is designed to hinder the sale of cigarettes is fine by me. I’m not naive enough, however, to believe that this recent tax increase is going to keep any one of you from cutting back like you should. I’m not exactly convinced that anything would do that, unfortunately. There’s too much politics involved. Too many of the wrong backs being scratched by the wrong hands. Not too mention the complete and unending lack of consumer self-worth that perpetuates the flames of industry, supply/demand, and government. These three form the trifecta of the vicious circle known as Consumerism.

For example, in an article recently published by the Chattanooga Times Free Press, Senator Kurita - a democrat from Clarksville AND a registered nurse proposed two versions of our now in-tact bill, one of which would increase the tax by $1, resulting in $386.6 million additional dollars per year that would go towards HEALTH CARE. I’m sorry. Does anyone else see a problem there? Like I previously stated, none of us really believes that a tax hike is going to prevent anyone from reducing their spending on cigarettes. Cigarettes are a DRUG. People are addicted to them. They will do whatever it takes to continue buying them, regardless of the financial burden. So basically, lawmakers are saying, “Sure, go ahead and buy all you want. We’ll just use the extra tax to pay for your lung transplant.”

I believe Sally Struthers has a commercial spot about this. I think it goes something like this:

Do you want to smoke more cigarettes? Sure! We all do! Hi, I’m Sally Struthers, and I’m here to tell you how you can smoke more AND get the healthcare you’re going to need because of your nasty habit! For .42 cents a pack, your loving lawmakers will set aside your tax dollars to fund your hospital bills after you lose your lungs to Marlboro. Isn’t that great?! Don’t even THINK about crossing that Kentucky line to buy your cancer with less tax! This offer is only good on smokes bought in Tennessee.

Senator Kurita also went on to say, “You know, a cigarette tax is something that’s going to stop children from smoking.” Don’t even get me started on the reasons children do and do not smoke. Let’s just say it has more to do with what they see their parents doing or not doing, and NOT how much tax is tacked on to the pack. Kids don’t think about tax. They don’t even know it’s there. And they, like their smoking role-models, are going to buy and smoke cigs no matter what the tax rate is. As long as mom is handing over a $20 so Junior can run to the store and buy her a carton, Junior is not going to care if the tobacco tax is higher this year than last.

Don’t worry, the madness gets better. Richard Floyd a REPUBLICAN from Chattanooga, actually defended the democrat’s proposal saying this, “If it keeps one person from smoking, it will save us goodness knows how much money in health care”.

I actually have no response to this. Other than, that’s just plain stupid.

Ok, ok. I promised you could say your peace. Please be aware, though, that I am going to charge you .42 per comment to fund my trip to Utopia - a place where cigarettes, politics, and morons do not exist.

As of last night, I expect to be a first-time home owner by October!

There is a TON of new construction on the southside of Nolensville Road between Old Hickory Blvd and Franklin. Their calling it “Cane Ridge”, but if we’re all going to be honest with ourselves, it’s still Antioch. Hopefully though, with all the new developments, this will change the face and reputation of Antioch.

I am very excited about my investment, but still kind of freaking out. I mean, unless you have a gazillion dollars, who DOESN’T freak out over the word ‘mortgage’.

I’m becoming such an adult. Oy-veh.

I admit. I’m a tiny bit obsessed with my city.

Sometimes, I’ll be driving down I-65, and I’ll get a little giddy. Not because of where I’m going. Just because of where I am.

Is that weird to anyone? Does this happen to anyone else?

Maybe I’ll start a club. City-Stalkers Anonymous. Or a hotline. 1-800-HRT-NASH.

Is it possible for a city to get a restraining order against a person? Would it be a bit like deportation? Hmm…

If you didn’t or couldn’t live in Nashville, where would you most want to go and why?

I’d kind of like to hit Charleston, myself.

…but not in that domestic-dispute-Cops kind of way…

Happy Fourth!

So last night I was at Sambuca, hanging with friends and listening to Eric Heatherly play on stage. I’ll admit right now I didn’t really want to go. I was tired and I wanted to get in bed at a decent hour, and every time we go to Sambuca we end up leaving much later than we intended. But I went because this was the last night Eric would be playing at Sambuca for the summer.

My resolve to leave early was strong though, and as soon as Eric was done with his first set, I got up to leave and started making the rounds of good-byes. I finally came to Eric to wish him well on the road this week. He and his band leave on a three week tour soon, and I knew he was really pumped.

Me: Good luck on the tour!
E: Thanks! I can’t wait to get OUT of Nashville!
Me: Yah, I think I know what you mean. But it’s good to be from Nashville…
E: Yah, it’s a great place to live, but it’s cancer when you’re working here (in the music industry, that is).
Me: I get it…when you’re a performer, you HAVE to go on tour. You have to get out of the local scene and get your music out there.
E: Are you from Nashville?
Me: No. I was born in California, and then we lived in Texas, Virginia, and Florida. This is the first place I’ve ever chosen to live.
E: Really?! So you had to live in all those other places…
Me: Yup. Eric, have a great tour. But just remember: it’s good to be from Nashville.